What Is Love?
Philosophers have written tomes on the reasons for love. Poets have filled manuscripts with the imagery and emotions of love. Musicians have sung songs about the joys and pains of love. But all have really been asking the same big question—“What is love?” Love cannot be defined as a culmination of feelings and emotions. Love cannot be defined as situations, events, or outcomes in life. Love cannot be defined as the perceptions and actions of other people. Love cannot be defined as itself (i.e. “love is love”). Love can only be defined by God. In fact, love can only be defined through God, because God is love (1 John 4:8).
1 John: The Book of Love
“We love because he first loved us. If anyone says, “I love God,” and hates his brother, he is a liar; for he who does not love his brother whom he has seen cannot love God whom he has not seen. And this commandment we have from him: whoever loves God must also love his brother.” (1 John 4:19-21)
The book of 1 John uses the word love 46 times, and 27 times in chapter 4 alone. John, the “disciple whom Jesus loved” is writing a letter to the church to describe how the love of Jesus should manifest itself among believers. In chapter 4, he begins to lay out both the source of our love and the substance of our love. Here are five aspects of love that this book helps outline:
1. Love is our FOUNDATION
If God didn’t show us his love first, we would be incapable of love. We wouldn’t even know where to begin. Fortunately for us: “God shows his love for us in that while we were still sinners, Christ died for us.” (Rom 5:8) God the Father demonstrated his love for us by sending His Son, Jesus Christ, to die for our sins and give us eternal life (Jn 3:16). He then gifts us with His Holy Spirit upon our salvation (Eph 1:13). God’s love lays the groundwork for not only how we are to love, but our ability to love rightly. This love is not a slowly dripping faucet or a well we must dig for ourselves. It is a rushing stream that flows from His heart into ours. “God’s love has been poured into our hearts through the Holy Spirit who has been given to us.” (Rom 5:5)
2. Love is our MOTIVATION
Why do we love? Because He first loved us! Our motivation is not about appearance, pride, comfort, or feelings. Our motivation is the indescribable love that we have already been shown by God Himself. When we find ourselves lacking motivation, Stephen Cole writes,
“If you are struggling to love someone, especially someone who has wronged you, meditate on God’s love as it was shown to you at the cross. You did not deserve it in any way. On the contrary, you deserved His wrath and judgment. But in spite of all of your sins, Jesus willingly suffered the penalty that you should have received. Now He wants you to be the channel for His love to other sinners.” When you feel a lack of desire to love and feel stranded out in a sea of apathy or hate, look to Jesus. Remember his life, death, and resurrection for you. That daily reminder will fill your sails and drive you towards others in love.
3. Love is an EXHORTATION
Our command is to love. Not to be nice. Not to be moral. Not to be polite. Not to stop hating. We are told to love. God is not commanding us to love when we feel like it. He is commanding us to love even when we don’t feel like it. Love is not an emotion but an action. For John, to say “I love God” is only true when we also love our brothers and sisters. Jesus repeated this command over and over on the eve of his death. If there was one thing he wanted to drill into the minds and lives of his disciples, it was this: love each other!
A new commandment I give to you, that you love one another: just as I have loved you, you also are to love one another. (John 13:34 ESV)
This is my commandment, that you love one another as I have loved you. (John 15:12 ESV)
These things I command you, so that you will love one another. (John 15:17 ESV)
4. Love is an EXAMINATION
John calls for our life to match our lips and our practice to match our profession. We can only respond to God’s prevenient love toward us by reflecting, echoing, and embodying that love to our neighbor. You cannot love God without sacrificing something of yourself in the service of others. Anything less than this makes a liar out of us! We all too often think we do a pretty great job at loving people…because we aren’t looking through the lens of Christ’s love but the world’s love. Christ-like love calls for sacrifice. We must give of ourselves as servants. Believers should use this example to examine our own practice of love.
5. Love flows from our SALVATION
“Everyone who believes that Jesus is the Christ has been born of God, and everyone who loves the Father loves whoever has been born of him.” (1 John 5:1)
This verse helps summarize all of John’s previous four chapters of argumentation involving belief, obedience, and love.
To believe in the Incarnation involves birth from God.
To be born of God involves loving God.
To love God involves loving His children.
Therefore, to believe in the Incarnation involves loving God’s children.
If you find yourself lacking love run to the cross! This is where you’ll find love. Not mere mortal love. Not fleeting, imperfect love. Not selfish or temperamental love. At the cross is where you’ll find the perfect, all-satisfying love of God! When you place your trust in Christ and His work, this love becomes your love. The Holy Spirit pours it into our hearts. We become pictures of God’s love to the creation which bears God’s image. Perhaps you realize you don’t love. Maybe you realize you’ve never truly loved with a love like this. Repent of your loveless heart and ask God to pour his love into you. Pray that the Holy Spirit would continuously point your fragile, weary heart to our perfect Savior who loved without fault. Who loved sacrificially. Who loved completely. Who loves you.
